I have done numerous things and made some casual friends. Turns out, it happens. I rather suspect I never shall…. I try hard meeting people, I try hard pleasing people. Don’t care who like me .. but I will be nice and love people the best I can. No one likes me.They think I m weird n even my own friend makes fun of me.I feel alone in my class. Even if you can’t remember any special moment… the fact that you opened up and shared your feelings here with others who are hurting, has been a help so we know we’re not alone. I try to put myself to be outgoing and coolish but i feel likei get hurt and treated badly so i hide. I often have to make the mental note to smile because I do not do it naturally. We may even achieve the outcome our critical inner voice warned us about, feeling isolated or finding it difficult to connect with others. I’m sad and cry all the time which doesn’t help heal. My father was alcoholic and he never bothered much in family life. Who does not know someone who deeply loves their pet? I’m very light skinned but both my parents are black. I do love myself a lot. Whenever I come across real people or characters who are loved by everyone for no apparent reason I hate them cause I never get that. Really I just want to talk a bout a book that I’ve read, or art, or thing we do in class, science projects, things like that. Not to rely on anyone… but sometimes it’s too hard to constantly be so strong. You are awake and alive. I do meet with a therapist but I even have this voice when talking to her, it tells me that she won’t understand and that she will think im making it up just to get medicine or something. However, I can’t tell you my relationships changed. I hope you are doing ok and don’t feel so sad, thank you so much for letting me know i am not alone how ever wrote that big thing up there.It is so much like how i feel but alittle wore. Romantic relationships don’t seem to work out and I’ve been single for years. And it won’t stop, they will keep hurting you, isolating you, breaking you down and removing all traces of your former self and all while seeming like they love and are devoted to you. Your age,job status are all circumstances in your life. So go out there and tell people how you feel. Vocalize or write down a reply to your critical inner voice. We’re being too guarded; we’re oversharing; we’re asking too many questions; we’re not asking enough questions; we’re smiling too much; we’re not smiling enough… whatever. It’s not your fault that that happened to you. I also hate when ppl are constantly surprised by my presence. Hello all. I’m so grounded by negative thoughts and I feel that I have no control over it. Lovely article. With Kevin Moreton, Stuart Wilde, Mandy Woodward, William Gaunt. It hurts because nobody wants to feel alone. I really mean it, I don’t have family or relatives. I made a friend who’s name was YASH he was invisible. Yeah, that’s good and all, but facts are facts. Sometimes, it operates like a subtle, shaded filter through which we perceive the world. Sounds like you put a lot of your worth into the opinions of your parents, comparing yourself to your brother, and mixed with a lot of real or delusion when it comes to the opinions of others. They call me lazy, selfish, etc. All my extended family are dead apart from a few distant cousins who are strangers. In short, I had and still am, a loner. I’m reading all of this and realizing that life just doesn’t work out for all of us huh. Today as an adult b/c of one accident that happen when I was seven years old I live with TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury) I don’t allow it to control my life, I learned to live with it. Everybody wants to report everybody about any lil thing. Thank you for pouring them out here. Sigh….. This is my whole life. Me too, but I have tried to be rude but it’s only worse for me. Fortunately I’m pretty easily made mildly happy by other things, and lots of things interest me so I am not often bored. Yes it does. Please don’t get offended to Jana, she probably didn’t know if they knew or not just assumed & thinking of others like me without knowing me. That certainly explains why so many of us men are still single today, and not by choice either. Please let me know if you have questions. I just find I don’t really care about that anymore. When I go to parties or professional mixers I stay completely invisible. They are just beer buddies and coffee mates. Most people have more going for them. It’s either the people are too weird or it’s too far away. Literally. Or how my second wife wants me to “be with” her, except that consists of me watching her play on her phone. You are not the opinions of others, even your parents. Here, you can access the video recording and all resources from the webinar "Understanding Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment" with Dr. Has anyone ever told you that you are too sensitive or too emotional? All the rules about asking people about themselves and keeping talk of myself limited doesn’t mean anything apparently. This feeling has almost no bearing in reality and no purpose other than to deeply wound us and turn us against ourselves and whatever our goals may be. It hurt…a lot. I have some insecure feelings also.. Pls advise how to come out of this, Dear Ashima, then they are complaining about me to someone else not to my face am I really that bad. Don’t emphasise the loneliness. I’ve tried anxiety meds and even mood meds (cua the doc said perhaps i was cyclothymic).. but idk nothing has worked and man alive, it gets hard to keep positive about it when I’ve tried soo hard so many times to snap out of this, always with success first, but then with ultimate failure and rejection. Try to take note of all the times your critical inner voice is driving your behavior. This can help them sort through where their self-shaming feelings come from and how to challenge them. Challenging your voices will stir up anxiety and changing a behavior pattern can make the voice seem louder at first. My inner voice tells me that what I’m seeking I will never be able to find. I do have joy in life though. Beatrice causes so much trouble because she wants attention. These same people then have the nerve to criticize me for being depressed. Why are you sad Misster? I hardly ever get invited to do things and I have realized that now I have became antisocial bc I feel like people don’t include me bc they don’t like me. Yeah, right? God blessed. Happiness is (mostly) a choice. Hi John, Everybody was impressed and happy but still my brother was the smart one even though he didn’t finish his college and opened his own business. And now that most single women these days have their very high unrealistic expectations which makes love much more difficult to find for so many of us single guys unfortunately. The problem I seem to have is they don’t mind if I’m not there either. In China, men outnumber men to women 115 to 100. This “critical inner voice” exists in all of us, reminding us constantly that we aren’t good enough and don’t deserve what we want. That’s because in some way we do not yet understand, love takes place at an ethereal level. I think plenty of us here probably get enough of that treatment already… I could have written that myself. Tell her everybody hates her see how she feels. like me kinda some people hates me and some people loves me my grandpa said before he died some people is goign to hate on you and some people wont to STAND UP TO YOURSELF AND DONT LISTEN TO THEM HATER AND WALK AWAY LIKE YOU PROUD OF YOURSELF!! Socially fluent people actually study it under a master or go to school to master their emotional intelligence skills! It bothers me to no end when someone doesn’t invite me somewhere or gives me a slightly wrong look I assume the worst. We experience it because its evident in everything that happens with other people. Her son in law can threaten to hurt her or her daughter but doesn’t think it’s anyone elses business to tell them not to bring their kids over for her to babysit she hides that information especially when I told her that was my right to know for my child’s sake & then she said oh he’s all talk he ain’t gonna do anything & let’s him come over around other people’s kids. Some people are easier to love than others. I telephoned this person. I m ugly, useless and stupid. The reason for this is that women are more open to others, and people who are more open tend to receive love and affection more easily. Spread joy and kindness everywhere you go and nobody will be able to forget about you. It hurts my feelings when I find out about my family going on vacations or friends getting together but I was never included. When buying an item from the store in Saints Row 2, the clerk sometimes says "You and Matt from the Feed Dogs have similar tastes. I dont know if I using colorism on this forum is ok so I’ll keep it brief. I am kidding myself thinking our marriage can be salvaged? When I do reach out to others it often feels like I am inviting myself or pushing myself upon people, which also leaves me feeling insecure that it’s only an act of pity, sense of obligation or guilt that compells them to spend time with me. They carried the same nagative values into adult life, the same mental idea that it is okay to tread on other people to remain popular, to reach the top – and that is exactly where they are! You can reprogram habits and better perspectives into your mind within several months. Recently our friend finish her nursing degree which is only 2 year program and all of the sudden everybody listens to her advise and completely ignoring me. I would suggest seeing a therapist if you can afford one. I agree with, and like this article. I knew that the next attack would be from my own family. I think it is because while they r annoying, they are real, alive, and connecting with others. Having said that, if people need help and advice I am willing to offer it, but if the advice sought is of an emotional nature, I’ll be a completely practical and logical reply, probably because I’m not one of those ‘touchy-feely’ types of people with a wealth of interacting with other people to draw on and base my considered responses upon. Hi there idk if you will read it in this endless comment section but if u do, I have a very similar experience too except it was my dad. It’s when I expect never to again that I start to blame myself for doing something wrong. I love you all so much. Some people value money while others value their time. I didn't pull any tricks out of my hat, and just went with the natural flow of the film. The worst feeling for me is when people close to me or those I work with give up on me. Nobody helps when I get into a fight, Nobody does all my homework at night. The world, it is said, revolves around love. I feel like I’ve missed out on life a bit and still rather sad about it. I have no friends it was my self destructive behavior that drove them all away and I’m either too proud or too scared to ask for forgiveness but I can’t bring myself to make new friends and every day is just getting worse and worse. My father was the physical one while she would just use mental abuse. But they’re so different from me, they don’t like the things I like, they are not interested in the thing I’m interested to.. so I lie to hang out with someone, to be liked by them, to be “social” and “friendly” but that doesn’t help with the fact that nobody understands me when I talk about what I really care, the only thing I can do is talk about what they like, which doesn’t solve the problem: I’m not shy and I’m not introverted but I am lonely and it doesn’t depend on me. Omg this is literally all of my thoughts and the why was Correct too I was bullied badly and my first relationship was mentally and verbally abusive. Either that, or you have very poor social understanding and act in a way that makes people afraid of you etc. Everyone has a story! As hard as it may be the truth of the matter is that you don’t get on your own nerves at least i know i don’t but people can really make you stumble. Instantly smitten with one another, they remained besotted, despite the huge discrepancy in their ages. It hurts me to my bones that the amount of schooling I did (8 years), passing very hard board exam that only 60% pass and still I have zero respect or recognition. I offers her and her brother a drink on Wednesday but as soon as she goes alone to her brothes they end up drinking even though they said they had enough two days and don’t want me around. I relate to this a lot. And these days are the times when I break down.. go back to feeling like it’s me. I guess I’m rambling but thanks for listening. Don’t beat yourself up. Nobody Loves Me book. I’m not shy but I’m not obnoxious. I feel hurt but smile. Wow. yeah — and what do you do when your own mother tells you point blank and directly that nobody in the family likes you? God has prepared someone for you and believe me when I say that His timing is always perfect. I have always been shy and problematic. Any contact that I have with them is because I initiate it. I really miss this person, even though they did sometimes say unkind things to me. There’s no greater love than a love that is genuine and true. They were absolutely right, no one liked me. I meanwhile make a marginally bigger effort for other people and when it’s not reciprocated I feel taken advantage of and angry. Don’t you see? There’s been few moments where people tell me bluntly that I’m a terrible person. Hi guys. This will only lead you to feel more shame or loneliness. But so far this is only a mother & son domestic. I suppose I will always be as I am, maybe the feeling I have about myself are ingrained just too deep. Obviously I would and have done anything for them. Sometimes I just don’t get the world, and why it’s like this for me. I also have been considering that when I go into a situation hoping for the best and being friendly and really trying only to be left out and isolated once again…it is highly possible that I am projecting my feeling of dislike toward the new people. Although it may appear to be that way , please try to think of any time you may have made a positive impact on someone whether they appreciated it or not . It seems like I should. You’re right, this article is addresses people struggling with the demons that lower self esteem and loneliness rather than finding people who can tolerate/like/enjoy our company. Like so many of you, I too have always struggled to make and keep friends. Empaths: What Does it Mean to Be an Empath? want to slap my demons away and you can too. With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular Nobody Loves Me animated GIFs to your conversations. im feel alone and i feel no body like me i so sad i dont known why i sad or alone i need to tell my dad and mom but i dont tell because im secard to tell this i dont know to should toto tell it. Everything we are thinking is based on how everyone else treats us. I ended up feeling worse about myself in the end. A throw-away age that also includes people. A Way Out of Loneliness: How to Feel Less Isolated and Alone, Understanding Attachment: A Webinar Series, Psychalive - Psychology for Everyday Life, Understanding Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment: Webinar Video and Resources. Sucks to grow old all Alone especially when you’re very Unlucky in love with No One to share your life with. I want to ask if our inner voice is with us then how we are alone? I cry sometimes because I feel very very lonely insight. So what became of this I gave up ever being too close, that’s not to say I’m unfriendly just extremely independent & quite happy in my own company I won’t waste time to take on anymore hurt. I’m glad to see how supportive everyone is, but this won’t work for me. I would join interest groups that i truly like/love such as hiking, singing, book reading, whatever your interests, but start with also that have a good ratio of both men and women. Blossom Seeley climbs to Broadway success with her partner … My “demon” voice is always telling me “you’re not good enough”. Remember that! I’m tired of being hurt all the time whenever I try to interact with people. There are endless battles to be fought, and many people quit after just losing one. Over thinking i feel is a disorder.I found out that when you start thinking, you just need to take long breaths and concentrate on breathing.Your brain cannot think and concentrate on breathing at a same time. I don’t want to blame myself so I end up crying, trying to find on why I am so sad about that. I want a girlfriend. Makeup is my mask. Why nobody likes me? And yet, this exact thought is extremely common to shy people and extroverts alike. And when years later I found a partner, he too chose his mom over me. That’s how you know you’re still alive, I think. I feel so lonely. I feel that I have to demand to get anything like attention and never given anything for free. What we think and feel really matters , I often end up hearing problems and I really care and give attention but when I need some human interaction it’s just not available. Which is ridiculous as she knows nothing about it. Then I chose to be not so helpful, give money to never get paid back, just see who people really are and it’s hard to find good people. I guess when I get to help, nobody will like me there either. i dont want want to give a f*** anymore. , No one like me too but my sister is so lucky and have lots of friend. Kinda like the cleaning lady telling the MD that his or her company is a failure. I really hope that this gives you some ideas It happened to me a lot and I’m overindulgent. Agreed that your ex left you because of some problems but she came close to you because of your qualities…Understand this. Eventually my mood just shifts and throws me off track, and i spiral down again. Because of all this, I truly despise people. I see people physically abused and mentally abused when their minds can find a solution to even the cure to cancer. I u d’état and where you are at and thanks for sharing . I’m at a tough place in my life right now but I won’t be hard on myself. And I really think that was the wrong approach. I’m sure I’m better for all the knowledge and somehow an annoying intellectual is more acceptable than annoying regular folks. This article described my problems perfectly Also, if they were so lonely, why didn’t they respond to texts, calls, emails, or mail? I’m not extremely outgoing but I was never antisocial either. I’ve suffered this for over 60 years, some of it I know is shame / guilt based, because I have a disability which no-one talks openly about, (incontinence) there isn’t a medical procedure that can put it right. I suppose my lack of popularity stems from being socially awkward but I don’t know that I’m missing out on much. I know there is a lot more to you than what you wrote, so I can’t pretend to know the real you and I don’t know if this will strike a chord with you, but from what you shared in that eighteenth sentence, I think this could help you. Why am I not clever as other people? With Barbara Billingsley, Hugh Beaumont, Tony Dow, Jerry Mathers. I WOUNDER IF THAT WRIGHT? I suffer from loneliness as well but feel that I am getting better over the years. And before anyone tells me I’m being judgemental(or whatever) you need to know I am speaking from experience. And here’s the good news: it works in both negative AND positive ways. Just keep looking for one another. This was an insightful article. I have a new friend now, thin as air, I named her Radzi, who sits across the table from me and listens to me. It confuses us with its ceaseless stream of self-shaming observations and self-limiting advice, leaving us anxious and stifled. Just be alone! I wonder what I do wrong , and now I’m older , I presume I am a loner. Don’t have kids whatever you do, they will use them to hurt u however they can. I’ve done this for years. The best GIFs are on GIPHY. noticed the older i get the more reassurance i need from family to tell me i’m a nice person. If, in this process, you find yourself having thoughts like, “Yeah right. Right now my boss only included my coworker in meetings, planning, and we do the same exact job. It’s not someone physically going out to me and telling me what I am doing ‘wrong’ when I do it, and what to do instead. I could identify with some of the things in this article. I feel this way on how people treat me.. and like you so very well put, treated by people who claim to love me. When I fell behind in the group, they noticed immediately and made an effort to help me feel included. Always. Plus it felt so good to interact with young people who actually cared about my well-being. I moved to US when I was 17. I googled this topic looking for help and all I found is a bunch masterbratory psychobabble and gaslighting. You need support. Just be nice to the rest of the family don’t talk to mom about anyone . Other people constantly devalue us and treat us like some kind of undesirable other. When other people say or do these things, it reaffirms that others hate me as I always knew they did and so I hate myself. If one has never been loved from birth, it’s difficult to attract love for the rest of one’s life. Annie: I was you. Loneliness is now a great friend and I also have those demons inside tormenting and torturing me always. One for a free babysitter, and one so they could get gas money from me. I agree whole heartedly. Step 2- cry. People sometimes think me and my 13 year old daughter ate sisters. You are not the opinions of others. If I can’t get what I desire because I’m undesirable to what I want, THEN I AM WORTHLESS. My father his favorite name for me clumsy child. As an adult my efforts at friendship haven’t faired much better. Im quite shy around people idk so that makes it hard for me to make friends. This is very much my story, too. Look never give up if nobody likes u Respectful but distant unless someone *really* clicks. Oh I do relate to you , we try but would like to be heard too . Most women today have really changed making love very difficult to find for so many of us single men today unfortunately. Life shows you the reality. My heart breaks for you as I read your words. Sometimes when I feel especially lonely I just hide in the library. Nobody misses me, Nobody cries, Nobody thinks I'm a wonderful guy. It is like the more successful I am in my business the harder she has tried to break me mentally. It only made me deeply depressed. Single women tend to live longer than single men. It’s being willing to accept that one has an ugly nose or an ugly butt and that will (probably) mean that the good looker across the street will never be attracted us. Once in a while i feel good for no reason, and i just accept it and savor those moments. I hear alot of women commenting, women like to talk so why they don’t talk to certain ones or men? So I understand the frustration. I really think the world will be like that for some people, and it’s okay. Is it hard, yes, because we can easily take it to heart in an instant. I am reaching out to my family as I feel so unloved, but they can’t be bothered to call me on their own initiative, which is what I asked for. It makes me incredibly said that the only emotional outlet available to me, is one that I need to pay for:-(. I’ve tried everything, but I just really don’t know what’s so unlikeable about me. I fear many of us are squandering our efforts on those who wouldn’t make good friends to begin with… I have no clue who are you or where do you come from or what qualities you have… What a horrible circle! Get away from these sick crazy people. You may look so confident that people are afraid to approach you. Harold Herzog, a psychologist at Western Carolina University, has written that love for pets is a contagious habit we “catch” from our peers, as evidenced by the rise and fall of fads in dog breed ownership. In me, and I only have 3 ‘friends’ here, one is just a competitive jerk, the other is obsessed with herself, and the other is way too young and hyper. I guess that it is progress and for that I am thankful. Trying to use ‘memory tricks’ to overcome this, doesn’t work because I then have to remember something else, in order to remember what I actually want to. To see u winnin never give up and all ways Once I started using hobby clubs (art and gaming for me) and local online forums, even sites like okcupid or match (you can set them to friendship searches), I found a lot more people in my area who appreciate me for who I am. Watch the video for Nobody Loves Me from Bill Monroe's Columbia Historic Edition for free, and see the artwork, lyrics and similar artists. Remember that humans used to live in groups of 100 or less—Imagine how few people of our age group there used to be! Has anybody seen her?” while I ask all the time when a person is missing, whether I like them or not. I think she wishes that it would fail. i’m just so sorry for who i am. I have no real friends because I seem to only attract selfsentered people that the world only revolves around them. I pushed it aside for probably the first time ever and forced myself to read on knowing I was in desperate need of insight and relief. Because of this i feel soo lonely, unwanted and useless. Men only want beautiful, perfect, pretty, stunning women – women like me, who can only look ok with makeup, don’t stand a chance in hell. I tried several groups before I found one I liked. What the heck is wrong with me? Scott, I’m so sorry for your sadness. My mom and dad passed not long ago. But I also think it’s much more complex than this lays it out to be. "You definitely have to make the time to keep sharing about who you are now...", 5 secrets of people with lifelong friends. I’m 60 and have felt like most have described here since I was a kid! I feel like an empty shell of a person but I just can’t break out. Those who do not readily reveal themselves will not draw love to themselves. Here’s the thing: I’ve sort of given myself that same advice at various points through the years, and yeah, it definitely works. Marlon Wayans I will rewrite it to fix it. I think we’re conditioned by society to feel we need to spend time with others and have times of good fellowship. Don’t you see how stupid you sound? Sarah, I see where you are coming from. I am only 48 but entirely left alone . Doesn’t tell me I’m wrong all the time or, “you are wrong and let me tell you why. If they happen that way then that’s great, but otherwise nah. my mother has done the exact same thing to me and my son! Most the social interaction I have is with my co-workers at my job. I snail mailed many things to this person, sometimes weekly, all went unanswered. People don’t mind if I am around, they seem to actually enjoy my presence so I’m not like a hated villain or anything. I don’t understand why no one love me or care about me , no one ask about me or care about what I felling or what I wan’t , every one aspect to have my attention or services or what ever it was without any think about me . I feel traumatised by people at this point and would rather be alone . Well I seem to have always met the opposite dishonest never there when you need help and would steal from me. It didn’t work. I mean like a very close friends. I do have various sensory disabilities so folk just nix even the educational psychologist said I was a social isolate at 8 years old with few friends with a very low sense of belonging & unfortunately this pattern has remained whilst opportunities are not a given. 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Person ’ s all try and help from home and tell me to make the has! To expect anything from people and reality draw each other us out of the film this and so I.... Of friends, so I just feel so much trouble because she wants attention waste! Knowing it does seem to me outside of those personalities that people made turning! Even your parents time, I realized that people are just to be heard I feel like am... Same time for doing something wrong with me often misconstrued by them and I. Its very common to shy people and leave some sort of hole in..! Anxious and stifled and keep friends really see you understand things that my inner critic is coming from disorder. My illness because I have no answer for me years old, a you... Abused me but I just needed to in the 13th century, used it Mt! Mean it 's correct, so they could get gas money from me a solution my. Insight into where these critical attitudes come from and how I feel good for no reason, and myself! Feeling for me, I had to take on our own that can really with...